A militaristic people invading, thinking they're the good guys, and assuming anything they do is ok because the people they're attacking are different? Good thing this is just sci-fi.
Kind of whiffed on the whole "twelve" thing. I imagined the aliens had 6 digits on their "hands" and counted in base 12. But then after writing the whole song I realized of course that we use base 10 and don't say "tenty". Getting past ninety-nine advances to a whole new word, and probably so would these aliens when they pass eleventy-eleven. And I can't change it now because it's part of a rhyme. So now, it seems the thing is that these aliens just really like the number 12. Or something else with a deeper meaning that I can take credit for.
Also, we have no idea how far they came from, because when they say "light-year", who knows how long a year is to them? Someone please do an analysis of all known exoplanets to determine which is closest to 144 light years away from the perspective of that planet's own orbital period. I'll be here, waiting.
lyrics
[Verse 1]
Twelvety light years,
And for most of your lives you’ve been training for this day.
All the right fears
Have been honing the edge of your seats in time for
Aerobraking, helmet shaking, making peace with Gleeble in his eminence.
[Chorus]
People of Earth, we bring you freedom,
Weapons aglow, and armored to the twelves,
Making friends at maximum warp.
Ready or not (ready or not), here we come,
Storming in hot to save you from yourselves.
Every human kneel and sing for the glory of Gleeble Glorp.
[Verse 2]
Stream out more slime.
I see patches of humans not in agony.
There’s no war crime,
When your enemy comes from a different point of
View. The way they look, the way they act, the way they worship’s just so alien.
[Chorus]
[Verse 3]
Just a scrimmage.
We can hardly expect a challenge to those made
In His image
From a people who still can’t keep from getting
Ice cream headaches, I mean come on. How can you not… no, forget it. Nevermind.
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